Thursday, 29 November 2012

Adam Sandler, Martha Stewart and plans beyond the tin can's capabilities

 image from Martha Stewart

That picture up there, with the perfect pie, that was going to be a picture of my perfect pie's, not Martha's. I promised the good, bad and ugly so here goes. It's a bit long winded and there's a tangent in there too, so bear with me!

Okay so earlier this week I made cookies, no big deal I make them a lot. I have my go to recipe, a chocolate chip oatmeal that over the years I have stripped of fat and sugar and made sufficiently healthy. This week though I felt we had had a bit of an oat overload in our diet and searched the web for an alternative. Many recipes came up with roughly the same ratio's of fat to sugar and I thought just this once (okay twice if we count the flapjacks) we would have the real thing in all it's high fat, high sugar glory. So I got as far as creaming the half cup of butter and the one cup of brown sugar and one cup of white sugar when I realized I couldn't do it. Now, I have this crazy thing where I think that if I just sub in one healthy thing, it will somehow void all the unhealthy stuff. So I put away the white flour and turned to my trusty whole wheat and for good measure threw in a few tablespoons of ground flax too. (See what I mean, like ground flax and undo all that butter and sugar, but it makes me feel better so there.) This however turned the mixture from light drop cookies to firm cookie dough, again, no big deal. I rolled it up into two long sausages and popped them in the freezer planning to bake some later and have the rest ready when needed.

So the pie's up there in the picture, well I've had a craving for meringue lately and the above pictured recipe came to mind. It was published a long time ago and I had only made it once before but it was delicious. Thinking myself so smart and such a culinary genius I had an ah ha moment. Why not make the bases from the cookie dough instead of pastry. Want to see how that turned out?

Yeh, well, turns out I'm not a culinary genius. It was actually a good thing as the truth is the meringue would have been a disaster too as I don't have a broiler. Honestly, I don't know what I was thinking.

Where does Adam Sandler come into all this? Well to cap my day of kitchen hopelessness off, I made 'The Worlds Greatest Sandwich', introduced to us by Adam Sandlers character in the movie Spanglish. Turns out you can't cook bacon in an rv without smoking out the whole family and setting off the alarm. The world's greatest sandwich rapidly turned into the totally not worth it sandwich (not really) as I ran between the alarm armed with a tea towell  which I flapped desperately at the ceiling, the stove top where the bacon was causing all kinds of trouble, while trying to pry two bread rolls apart that had morphed into one between baking and freezing.

So what does one do when your kitchen turns against you. You call in the Doctor.

At least pudding was good:)


The World's Greatest Sandwich  from the movie Spanglish

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